The Lord Has Promised Good To Me

Summer.

2009-06-10T11:30:00.005-05:00

I think we'll just play with trucks all day.

Simply because we can.

ONE!

2009-04-25T23:19:00.004-05:00

365 days of pure Heaven.

Please Summer, Hurry.

2009-04-19T21:46:00.006-05:00

I need to spend every waking moment watering the garden,

sitting in the grass,

and staring at her beautiful face.

Whoa.

2009-04-18T01:47:00.009-05:00

Frozen blueberries can be very dangerous.

Hippity Hoppity.

2009-04-13T22:05:00.005-05:00

A Few Choice Faces For Ear Infections.

2009-02-28T22:02:00.003-06:00

Good Lighting Is A Must When Reading.

2009-02-22T19:06:00.001-06:00

Ask Me If I Care.

2009-02-21T16:26:00.009-06:00

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

Exhibit C

Exhibit D

Hello, Brain? You Have My Permission To Return Now.

2009-02-04T21:48:00.000-06:00

I used to think of myself as a relatively "with it" person prior to the Quadruple Years of Conception. I always remembered to put deoderant on, never forgot to take my Crazy Pills, thought people were insane that forgot their passwords, had an impecable desk, remembered what people told me about their lives, was OCD organized, and remembered just about anything long enough to at least write it down before totally forgetting it. However, four pregnancies, 9 month of nursing, and 53 Big Macs later I have deep fried any remaining brain cells and I'm beginning to be okay with it. Maybe even laugh a little about it because my brain "Can't-Get-Right".

The other day I got into the shower, water drenching me, with my bra ON.

Before Christmas, I left the car RUNNING and UNLOCKED for 45 minutes while in Target. CANNOT-GET-RIGHT.

I can't tell you how many times I've forgotten my pump, bottles, lids, etc. and realized it when it was time to pump at work. Cling wrap and rubber bands do not serve as effective lids to hold milk in while driving home, let me just tell you.

I've come inches away from backing into My Babe's vehicle TWO times, forgetting he was parked behind me.

While driving through ~~Whataburger~~, a very nasty hamburger place that will remain nameless, I asked my mom FOUR times whether she wanted cheese on her nastyburger and all FOUR times didn't pay attention to her answer.

I Can't-Get-Right anymore, and I don't really care.

A Much Needed Vacation.

2009-01-25T20:34:00.000-06:00

Last week we made the rounds to see family in Lubbock, Santa Fe to ski & sled, Albuquerque to visit a sweet friend, El Paso to see more dear friends, to the Davis Mountains, and home again. Kallie is an expert hiker and squealed with delight each time she got in the backpack carrier. She is a girl on the go!

So Sweet.

2009-01-24T15:28:00.000-06:00

What a sweet family to do this in rememberance of all the smallest angels in the world.

She Comes By It Honestly.

2009-01-14T21:57:00.008-06:00

Turns out Kallie likes cows too. The girl can put back some food and I love it. The only two foods she doesn't care for (but will tolerate with the help of a little applesauce) are pears and pluots. Everything else enters her mouth and goes straight to the tummy without even a wince.

To date she has on a regular basis...

Applesauce
Asparagus
Avocado
Bananas
Black-Eyed Peas (for New Year's, of course!)
Blueberries
Broccoli
Butternut Squash
Carrots
Cauliflower
Cheese
Chicken
Green Beans
Ground Beef & Onions
Kiwi
Oatmeal
Oranges
Pasta
Peaches
Pears
Peas
Pineapple
Pluots
Potatoes
Puffs
Pumpkin
Quinoa
Rice
Sweet Potatoes
Teething Biscuits
Tofu
Turkey
Yogurt

Next in line...

Bell Peppers
Edamame
Garbanzo Beans
Lentils
Mango
Polenta
Rhubarb (just for you MDK)
Salmon

I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this trend continues and we don't ever hit the "I'm not eating that!" stage. Wishful thinking I know, but a mommy can dream.

I'd Like One Medium Cow Please.

2009-01-05T22:21:00.000-06:00

Because mama can eat like nobody's business.

I'd like to resume my normal eating habits, but it's safe to say that ain't gonna happen while nursing this 8 month old chunk. Each morning I wake with the best of intentions to eat healthy and resonable portions, ask for help from the Lord above for this simple request, and then my feet touch the floor and it's all over. I immediately start salivating for junk, and lots of it. I ate pistachio cookies for breakfast 3 days in a row. As I type I can hear the Santa Claus Snickers calling my name from downstairs. An Oreo shake from anywhere would do me good right about now. But it's not just junk that I want. I ate a Garden Turkey Wrap as big as my face the other day and still wanted more food. Most of the time I can't chocolate cookies keep kettle corn a straight thought Coke.

See what I mean? Moo...

Off To A Good Start.

2009-01-02T22:39:00.001-06:00

First Night Austin with Kallie proved to be all I hoped from last year.

Now to begin a much needed "inner overhaul" and get serious with taking care of my body, my mind, and my spirit.

Every Moment Of The Day I Am...

2008-11-27T23:26:00.005-06:00

I Need A Weekend From The Weekend.

2008-11-17T22:29:00.002-06:00

I opened my eyes in a bad mood today and I stayed that way. I've learned that not enough "down time" on a weekend makes for a craptastic start to the week. Too many errands to run, too many undone tasks, and the beginning of the holiday rush makes my head hurt. My efforts to simplify haven't truly worked yet, but I will press on and find a way to carve out time for the important things - My Babe, Kallie, and the park.

Defeated Just a TINY Bit.

2008-11-09T21:00:00.008-06:00

Who cares. We had a fabulous weekend walking around campus, spending time with family, and enjoying the sights at the game. We're starting our Future Aggie out early!

Fear Factor For Babies.

2008-11-02T23:32:00.002-06:00

The first day of a new food is not the favorite around here. We've tried avocado, sweet potatoes, carnival squash, and pumpkin so far. She likes them all now, but certainly didn't when we started. The gagging and shuddering were so sad, but she's been a trooper ever since!

Half A Year Already.

2008-11-02T13:32:00.000-06:00

Tootsie Roll or Flying Nun?

2008-10-31T23:03:00.000-05:00

The Cutest Feet Ever.

2008-10-30T23:24:00.000-05:00

Thanks CB & KB!

Exactly What I Deserve.

2008-10-19T20:41:00.005-05:00

I grossly underestimate how long it will take me to get out of the house on a regular, okay...daily, basis. I'd like to blame this on Kallie, but she hasn't been around for 32 years. I have really good intentions prior to getting ready and then I start doing other things (read: stay in bed or obsessively try to clear off counters) that hinder me from finding my way to the car on time. Sabotage again and again.

Today Kallie and I missed baby yoga and I'm still so mad at myself that I could just spit. We could have walked in 10 minutes late...people do it all the time...but I don't feel right interrupting the class due to my tardy problem. It's such a nice, fun, relaxing time together and I messed it all up. Kallie has serious yoga shoulders and she can do a half moon like nobody's business. However, she might not ever get to practice her craft until she's 16 and she can drive herself there because her mother will continue to act a fool when it's time to get ready.

All this I write at 9:03pm when I should be doing parent conference forms because conferences start tomorrow. I have not done one form yet. Remember my staying up late problem? Brilliant, I tell you. Just brilliant.

The Best Kind Of Pumpkin.

2008-10-18T20:03:00.003-05:00

Is It Possible...

2008-10-07T22:01:00.007-05:00

to gain 14 lbs. over a weekend?

Because I truly think I've accomplished that. My stomach is still rebelling from a fabulous weekend with my team (part of them, at least) on our weekend girl's trip to Rocky River Ranch.

Rocky River Ranch is a camp I attended as a young buck at the ripe age of 7, so it was neat to return and enjoy the activities as an adult with a women's retreat. We attacked the climbing wall, ventured to Wimberley market days, relaxed with a horseback ride, laughed until we slightly wet our pants, ate our way through a cow, and kicked serious butt in "Catch Phrase." It was a complete blast and I can't wait to plan our next adventure when everyone can go!

Thanks Grandma C and Grandpa for taking care of Kallie while My Babe was working hard!

I Think We Have Crazy Hair Day Covered.

2008-09-30T21:59:00.006-05:00

Note to self: Getting home at 4:15pm allows for a much more fulfilling evening. Work will never be completely finished and who cares. YOUR baby needs to see you laugh, play, talk, learn, and pour your everything into each minute of the day just like you do all day with OTHER people's children.

She Doesn't Miss A Meal.

2008-09-29T16:41:00.002-05:00

Oh how I love this kid. We'd have 22 more if it didn't involve pregnancy or money.

Game Day Is Serious Business.

2008-09-07T21:16:00.000-05:00

Do You See The Drippage?

2008-09-01T14:28:00.006-05:00

I have sweaty feet. Hence why I'd wear flip flops year round if my naked feet wouldn't draw attention to myself in the stark middle of January. But this kid has SWEATY feet. I mean dripping with water looking like she just came out of a pool sweaty. Next will come the stench, I'm sure of it. When I was 8 months pregnant, I knew immediately when the three year old sitting behind us in church took off her shoes. I was blown over by the smell and warned My Babe that we were about to become mobile if she didn't put them shoes back on stat. Kallie is going to be that girl. Poor stinky baby.

It's Been Awhile.

2008-08-30T21:53:00.006-05:00

Kallie is growing like a weed, laughing often, rolling over, nursing like a champ, teething, and sitting up quite well on her own. I miss her terribly during the day, but am so blessed to have My Babe and GiGi with her during the week. I can't say that I would rather work, but I will say when I get home I am much more focused on her and am able to let the dishes, laundry, emails, and cooking wait much longer than usual...and that is a great feeling.

Trying to find balance between school and home has been challenging this first week back. It's hard when your job really begins at 3:00pm as there is no way you can do a thing while the children are there and still teach effectively. I've been staying a lot later than I should, and must get better at that.

I'm finding it difficult to swallow that my favorite baby activities are only offered during the day so I am unable to attend, but I have decided that a monthly day off to attend such things just might be the cure I need.

For now, I'm just happy for this three day weekend - and a beautiful 4 month old.

The Swing Is Loved Around Here.

2008-08-15T11:19:00.002-05:00

Daddy Dates.

2008-08-13T23:58:00.005-05:00

She LOVES her daddy. And she is going to be one adventurous little girl that will never doubt how much he LOVES her.

A Rare Moment.

2008-08-10T23:52:00.002-05:00

We had a busy day from a swim party this morning to Kallie's first Round Rock Express game with friends. You are witnessing the 5 seconds that she sat and watched the game without crying. I do believe the spectators around us were quite thrilled.

The Joy of Discovery and Germs.

2008-08-09T23:02:00.006-05:00

Within the last few days Kallie has discovered that her hands have a purpose and has been reaching for things and, of course, placing them in her mouth. I've been better than I thought I would be, but that doesn't mean we don't need to pray that her germaphobic mother can turn the other way when big gobs of dirt enter her mouth on a regular basis.

I admit it. I'm a germaphobic weirdo and have big issues that my crazy pills don't really seem to help. Sometimes I open my own refrigerator or door handles with my shirt. I will hardly ever open my classroom door with my bare hands. I will never, unless I am desperate, use one of my kindergartner's pencils or scissors. And I wash my hands at least 40 times per day. But, sometimes I can be okay with germs. I can follow the 5 second rule with most things -especially if it involves food because I love to eat people and will sacrifice my sanity for food. My germ phobia can be quite sporadic at times and also quite intense at times. And it's all because I am terrified of the stomach flu. Really terrified. Disturbingly enough, I think about it all the time and dream regularly about it. I would love to be rid of this phobia so pass along some advice because my germ phobia sure didn't help me out during our trip to Wimberley.

But on the other hand, it's so neat to see her discover new things. To see the wheels turning in her head as she uses her hands to manipulate the world around her. I pray that I can let her be messy. And I pray that I can be messy with her. Germs and all.

Home For Good.

2008-08-08T22:29:00.007-05:00

School is about to be in full force, so our traveling days are over for awhile. We had another great trip spending time with family, enjoying the museum, and relaxing. Today Kallie enjoyed her new swing with GiGi and spent lots of time gazing at the trees. Next week marks my last week home before the daily grind begins and I'm not even close to ready for it.

And, do you really need reassurance?

Challenge #2.

2008-08-05T11:30:00.001-05:00

The first challenge is going very well, so I thought just maybe...

Ever Come Face To Face With A Train?

2008-08-03T00:25:00.002-05:00

Stomach Flu, You're A Jerk Face.

2008-08-02T14:55:00.011-05:00

Oh, there's nothing like a lot of barf to make life interesting while on vacation.

My Babe's parents graciously rented this AMAZING home, 7 Star Ranch, in Wimberley for a few days for us to be together as a family. All summer long I've been looking forward to meeting my new baby niece, spending time with the grandparents, relaxing by the river, and working on making this pale skin semi-tan without becoming fried chicken.

Unfortunately, the stomach flu had different ideas for a fun vacation. My Babe, Kallie, my mom, my sis-in-law, and I all had the pleasure of spending lots of time lovin' on the toilet and sleeping in the bed. We're finally on the mend, but a little bummed about missing out on some of the fun. However, we did get to enjoy the river and pool a little bit prior to the sick festivities, and certainly had fun just being together. In sickness and in health.

Snuggling with Kallie's cousin.

I need me one of these here swangs.

Float you cheap thing.

There's nothing like a grandpa.

One good looking daddy and one good looking baby girl.

Ready at a moment's notice: Lifeguard Grandma C & Lifeguard GiGi

My Strongest Weakness.

2008-07-27T23:58:00.001-05:00

This, my friends, is the ultimate challenge for me. My paper towel holder is empty and has been for five days. Five! Days! Five, I say! I guarantee you it is wondering what the heck is up. My OCD shows itself something fierce when it comes to germs, cooking, cross-contamination, and clean countertops. I use paper towels like mad while cooking, eating, washing my hands (a BUNCH), breathing, etc. Considering we are a relatively environmentally friendly and conservation-wise household, this poses a little bit of hypocrisy now doesn't it? Never fear. I'm going to lick this bad habit and maybe even my fingers too. I bought cloth napkins and fully intend to strictly use dish towels for cleaning the countertops and drying my hands. {Insert deep breath here.} Ready. Set. Go.

Sooo Big!

2008-07-26T00:02:00.000-05:00

Soak Him All Up.

2008-07-25T23:00:00.003-05:00

My Babe is the hardest working person I know. He currently works 3 jobs and never complains, despite the fact that he only gets a few hours of sleep at the fire station and that his other jobs take time away from his family at night and sometimes weekends. So, when he is home we soak in every bit of him that we can. Thank you, Babe, for everything you do for us. You are an amazing inspiration to me.

And So It Begins.

2008-07-24T23:14:00.011-05:00

I picked up the key to my classroom today. I did not enter the classroom because that would just be way too ambitious, now wouldn't it? This time of year is something that I dread. Getting back into the swing of school after being off for so long is no easy task, and this year will most likely be one of the most difficult starts yet. I am more than ecstatic that My Babe and my mom will be the caretakers for Kallie while I am off teaching young minds about the alphabet, but in my heart of hearts I'd much rather be at home. I've prepared myself for this moment of continuous work for years now, but I still can't find it in my body to be completely okay with it. I want desperately to be okay with it, because quite frankly, there is nothing I can do about it right now. Someday we will be in a better financial position to rethink this working thing, or at least to find something that will give me a little more flexibility. But, the reality of today is that school will start and I will be there for it. I must begin setting up my classroom already. It's gone so fast and I feel her little babyhood already slipping away. I'm so happy to have had the summer to spend all day long with this

and this

and this.

Simplify.

2008-07-22T13:24:00.005-05:00

I've cleaned out most of the cabinets and closets in an effort to simplify. However, I never seem to get there. There's always something to accomplish after the little one hits the crib. I need to eliminate things from my To Do list. I need to try not to run so many errands. Are they really all necessary? I need to prepare ahead of time for meals so I'm not spending so much time cooking or giving in and going out to eat. I need to be okay with not taking so much stuff everywhere with me. I need to limit my time on the internet. I need to simplify.

Do Nothing Monday.

2008-07-21T15:06:00.004-05:00

Last night we joined the rest of Austin in seeing "Beauty and the Beast" at the Zilker Hillside Theatre. We met up with CT from the fire station and had a yummy picnic while enjoying the play.

Summer tends to be our busy time of the year. I thought having a baby this summer would slow us down but it hasn't. So, it's nice to relax a bit. Today was a day for lounging in bed until noon, leaving the blinds closed, skipping the shower, catching up on TiVo, tummy time, letting the clothes stay unfolded a little while longer, reading books, lots of smiles, making homemade pizzas for lunch, fish tacos and raspberry tea for supper, and spending time outside on a blanket with GiGi. My goal this week is to have more days like this!

Clueless.

2008-07-20T00:40:00.007-05:00

My Babe's parents surprised us with a new camera that is WAY awesome and over my head...for the moment at least. I am determined to learn the ins and outs of an SLR and I can't wait to overcome my clueless status when it comes to photography. Thank you Grandpa and GC!

Tonight we ventured to Rebulic Square Park downtown for a movie on a giant blowup screen. Kallie hung out in her carseat while we enjoyed greasy hamburgers from Hut's. And, appropriately, the movie we watched was "Clueless."

Tiny Feet.

2008-07-18T23:22:00.005-05:00

Cute and cuddly...just put her in her giraffes and she's out for 8-10 hours, sometimes more. I don't think we'll ever get this lucky again.

We Big Puffy Heart Outdoor Concerts.

2008-07-17T23:57:00.007-05:00

One of our favorite restaurants, Shady Grove, has live music each Thursday during the spring and summer months. We enjoyed a relaxing evening on the blanket focusing on some much needed tummy time and lots of toys.

We had a great time and thought a lot about baby girl, MAC, that just entered the world today. Happy Birthday little one - we can't wait to meet you!

Not Exactly What I Planned

2008-07-16T23:57:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was spectacular. After 8 power-packed hours of sleep, I arose with the sun promptly at 6:00am. I happily swung my feet to the ground and stretched to welcome in the day. A faint aroma of coffee tickled my nose and I realized the nanny must have gotten up early.

I reached for my Bible and bounced down the stairs to continue my Bible study homework for two weeks from now. While on my way out to the covered deck in the backyard, I waved to the nanny who was busily preparing a breakfast packed with my daily requirement of protein and fiber.

After completing three days worth of homework, I moseyed back into the house and heard a faint giggle coming from the handset of the baby monitor. I entered Kallie's room and was greeted with a big smile as I plucked her from her crib. Being that it was 8am and she had slept for 10 hours, I quickly changed her diaper and clothes as she was most certainly starving. I nursed her for 45 quick minutes and we headed down to join My Babe for breakfast.

Feeling satisfied, we changed for our morning jog and placed a smiling Kallie into her jogging stroller. Deciding to take it easy, we ran a few 8 minute miles and ended at the neighborhood pool to cool down with a few laps. Kallie's nap was quickly approaching, so we ran race pace back to the house for a quick session of tummy time. After the daily 20 minute requirement, tummy time ended pleasantly and our next nursing session was successful.

By this time it was 10:45am and time for Kallie's nap. With a kiss on the forehead, she smiled and closed her eyes, already in REM sleep. My Babe got ready for his shift at the firestation while I did a little yoga to clear my mind from the busy morning and prepare for our daily trip to the library. Just as he was walking out the door admiring the rainbow majestically spanning in the east, the station called and gave him the shift off as they didn't anticipate any medical or fire calls within the next 24 hours. While Kallie was napping for three solid hours, I was able to take a nap, return emails, organize closets, soak in the bath, remind the nanny to vacuum and mop, and take a ride on my unicorn through fields of hearts and flowers.

Ha.

In all actuality, as I'm sure you've figured out by now, the day stunk. Our exercise plans were unsuccessful since we woke up too late and My Babe had to leave for his shift, we were out of my favorite bagels and milk, and I never made it to the library as planned or completed any of my (non-mandatory) Bible study homework that I am behind on. I put Kallie down for her nap at 10:45am and at 2:00pm I stopped trying to fight her on it, put her in her papasan chair and took a shower, at which time she fell into a deep sleep. At 2:30pm I was forced to wake her in order to nurse and pump before leaving the house at 3:30pm. The rest of the afternoon was not too bad, although I wasted 1.5 hours at the mall waiting to get my new glasses only to discover they wouldn't be able to have them ready until next week. After putting Kallie to bed at 9:45pm, I started this here post and promptly fell asleep old school, pre-baby style with all lights and clothes on, teeth unbrushed and face unwashed until 4:45am. I didn't even feed the dog (first time in 13 years) or finish my cookies and cream milkshake. Now, that makes for a bad day.

Good news? I still love every single bit of motherhood. And, today was a much better day.

So.Very.Tired.

2008-07-14T23:55:00.003-05:00

I Know You.

2008-07-13T23:46:00.006-05:00

I know you like to be moving at all times. I know the ceiling fan will entertain your little mind for a long time. I know you love to stretch. I know you don't like stop signs, stoplights, or going below 45 mph in the car. I know you hear the sound of your daddy's voice and smile from ear to ear. I know the papasan chair is your favorite little spot. I know you don't like your swing. Or tummy time. I know you like to sleep with your legs crossed and that lights fascinate you. I know you love to be outside. I know trees are your favorite thing to look at (besides your daddy.) I know you don't like the wind. I know you love to have your head upside down, your Brown Bear book, and warm water. I know you love to nurse. I know you are starting to find your voice. I know you love your hands on your chest near your chin. I know you love to cuddle and love your nighttime routine.

And even though I knew you before you were born, I am so happy to know you, really know you, now that you are here.

Guess What Mommy's Reading?

2008-07-12T19:22:00.006-05:00

Of course, not my usual summer reading material, but it helped me quickly rack up minutes for my own library reading log! Thanks to a sweet friend, KK, for the recommendation. It has definitely shed light on some of Kallie's symptoms and has helped us advocate better for her care with the pediatricians. A must read if you are the proud parent of a fussy one!

Now, your turn. What book's got you hanging on every word this summer?

There's Work To Be Done.

2008-07-11T17:12:00.004-05:00

Kallie is a member of the local library reading program. She's on her second reading log to score a total of 50 books! We make frequent trips to the library to refuel since the check-out limit is next to nothing. She really loves to read and focuses on each page with such intensity. Too bad for her that both of her parents are teachers. She has no choice but to enjoy it.

By Goodness...Swimming Cures Colic! (At Least For Tonight)

2008-07-10T21:38:00.017-05:00

Kallie's reflux has been challenging for the last month, but tonight we managed a non-screaming evening and it was a nice change. I've tried all kinds of things to keep her busy at night, but I think we've found the trick. She was calm and relaxed the whole time and quite worn out from all the swim strokes she practiced. We're going to swim rain or shine until this cure wears out its welcome. Thanks to the C family for a nice evening...and thanks, Aunt T, for Kallie's swimsuit!

I Have A Problem.

2008-07-09T23:40:00.000-05:00

I love to sabotage myself - I just can't figure out why. It is one of my strongest downfalls. Whether it is going to bed on time, getting up early, cleaning the house, writing thank you notes, or leaving the house on time for an appointment, I will find something else to do, I'll refuse to get out of bed, I'll find a "good reason" to put something off for a later time. Then, guilt abounds and I vow to do better tomorrow. However, tomorrow comes and we rinse and repeat. Here I sit, 40minutes past the time I gave myself for bed with things still left to do. I must find some type of satisfaction in it given I continue to do this each and every single day. Something has got to give.

We're Big Time!

2008-07-08T23:12:00.003-05:00

Tonight is the first night Kallie will spend in her crib. Trial runs during naps have worked well, so we're moving on up. We've got the video monitor, the Angelcare monitor, her big brother and sister in Heaven to watch over her, and the good Lord on our side.

Sweet dreams baby girl.

A Little Piece of Heaven

2008-07-07T23:08:00.006-05:00

We are sleepers around here, and it seems that our offspring has inherited the trait as well. She sleeps through the night and doesn't seem to be in the best of moods if you wake her up and dress for the day before 11am. She's getting a little better about it, but definitely takes after her mother...NOT a morning person!

Baby Boot Camp

2008-07-06T22:43:00.004-05:00

Sometimes when Kallie has a hard time following directions around here, we have to resort to extreme measures.

Seriously though, Slacklining, is My Babe's latest exercise, and I fully intend to become much better at it than he is. Rock climbers use this to strengthen their core muscles and improve balance. We used to rock climb quite frequently before I was restricted from exercise and I miss it and know My Babe does too. I really hope to return to rock climbing soon, but I have a lot of making up to do from this past year. It's been 10 weeks since the c-section so I have no more excuses. If Kallie willingly attends Baby Boot Camp, her mother should certainly get with the program too.

I Must Get Better At This

2008-07-05T09:28:00.008-05:00

I have so much to write, but it never leaves my head. Writing intimidates me. Especially when I read 30 blogs per day that have educated, humorous, well-written posts. I always want to sit down and plan what I type because the writer freak in me feels it must be the slightest bit worthy of sharing. As you can see, for awhile I haven't felt as if anything has been worthy. And, good grief, how could that be the case considering I have the sweetest little baby? A baby that is starting to interact, talk, smile, and just be down right cute on a daily basis? And honestly, I find it hard to write sometimes because of just that - oh, and I'm lazy too. I am happy. I have a wonderful marriage. However, not everyone does. Not everyone has a baby. People are struggling, but for once, I am not. I'm going to make it a personal goal to start writing daily (did I really just write that?) regardless. Oh Heaven help me...and thank goodness this counts for today.

How Else Do You Handle Summer In Texas?

2008-06-25T15:39:00.007-05:00

All Smiles And Lovin' Life

2008-06-24T17:30:00.004-05:00

Time.

2008-06-21T14:54:00.013-05:00

Time to enjoy the artistry of our favorite anniversary hideout, Trois Estate.

Time to be outdoors.

Time to think about swimming in the cold grotto.

Time for two grandmas and a great grandma to get in their "Kallie time."

Time to reconnect.

Time to relax, put our feet up, and read.

Thank you, Babe, for a fabulous time together, just the two of us. Happy 4th Anniversary - I love you more each day.

And, thank you GiGi, GC, and GY for keeping Kallie for us!

El Viaje del Camino a San Antonio

2008-06-17T01:06:00.007-05:00

Road trips are so much more fun with a baby...even if that baby sleeps the whole time. We spent Father's Day on the riverwalk enjoying the food, people watching, and the heat. We had to do something special to celebrate the best husband and daddy we could ever ask for.

In Which I Discuss My Mammary Glands

2008-06-09T17:28:00.008-05:00

Because I always have the interests of my reader in mind, ya know.

I've had a revelation.

I've discovered that for 32 years I have had the wrong definition of the word "hurt". The online dictionary describes "hurt" as the following: to damage or decrease the efficiency of (a material object) by striking, rough use, improper care, etc. OR to feel or suffer bodily or mental pain or distress.

Somehow, I thought I understood what that meant, and breastfeeding seems to fall under that category. However, six weeks into breastfeeding leads me to believe that I don't. I often hear, "Oh, it takes 2 weeks...3 weeks...6 weeks for it to not 'hurt'." What, pray tell, does the word "hurt" mean to these people? Because, obviously, we have differing opinions on the subject.

I'm far from quitting this thing, though. You see, I'm just a little bit stubborn - I like to call it determined. And, my body is thinking of this as a full blown challenge, like a Triple Dog Dare, in which I won't go down without a fight. I've endured countless blisters (STILL.), cracks, bleeds, creases, pinches, plugged ducts, and fought off mastitis. I pump and feed regularly and have since she was born, I've used every cream possible over the counter and prescription, given bottles to give myself a break and time to heal, and I've tried those darn shields. I've seen and talked with the best lactation consultant numerous times. In fact, each time I see her I have the overwhelming urge to kiss her when I leave because I always feel so much better. I assure you, Kallie has a good latch. She isn't picky about breast or bottle (she weighs 10 pounds now!), she just wants to eat, by goodness. The lactation consultant says she has never seen a baby pinch like Kallie does. Awesome.

If it weren't for My Babe's overwhelming support, I would have quit this thing long ago. So, pray for my mammary glands and that they make it out alive because this war is just beginning. I won't go down easy. I'm ~~stubborn~~ determined. Did you forget?

Normal.

2008-06-09T16:44:00.006-05:00

6 weeks is a beautiful age. I feel like we haven't even skipped a beat in our lives. Sure, the first few weeks were challenging (to say the least!), but things are back to normal...just at a little slower pace...which is more than welcomed around here.

We're pretty "on the go", so it's nice to be home more. However, Kallie is quickly becoming a World Class Austin Traveler. She's been on walks through Zilker Park, to stores and restaurants, to her first outdoor concert, and she has sat along the shores of Town Lake. We can't wait to start taking her in the bike trailer, to Barton Springs, and to as many outdoor activities as possible. Thanks to my amazing Babe, mother and mother-in-law, I've been able to go to lunch and dinner with friends, to get a pedicure, to run errands with just My Babe, as well as go on a pizza date with him. To me, showing your children that you have a life outside of them is one of the best gifts you can give. My next challenge is to hit the gym to my beloved Body Flow class.

And, remember all that talk about being afraid of how parenting would change my marriage? It did change. For the better, in fact. Of course, I can only speak for my marriage, but it was nothing like I thought. The transition was so surprisingly smooth and only made it stronger. I think there is something to be said for marriages that struggle through loss after loss, hope, pray, and wish for a baby for so many years. It's a lot easier to not take things for granted.

It's so nice to feel and be normal again.

Slow Down

2008-06-03T00:09:00.005-05:00

My sweet baby girl...You are already growing too fast. Your little legs reach the end of the papasan chair. You've already outgrown many clothes and are in the next stage of diapers. You are sleeping so well at night and adjusting to this big world easily. I just want to freeze every moment and keep you as little as you are today. If only I could make the hands of time slow down.

Kallie's Stompin' Grounds

2008-06-01T23:08:00.004-05:00

We still plan to add finishing touches to the walls and to incorporate The 12 Gifts of Birth. However, we had to fire the painter so we're on our own, which is a scary thought. But, this is proof positive that My Babe is an excellent husband, daddy, and carpenter!

An OCD'ers Dream

2008-05-29T00:13:00.011-05:00

Babies like routine. I like routine. Therefore, we get along beautifully.

The following nighttime routine helped Kallie flip her days and nights, she's sleeping for 3-4 hours at a time, and life is good.

Sit outside at dusk.

Snuggle.

Put on pajamas.
Snuggle.
Play our nighttime CD courtesy of my sweet St. John's friends.
Snuggle.
Nurse.
Snuggle.
Read a book.
Snuggle.
Blessing (Thanks, EKS) & prayers of thanksgiving.

Night, night.

Tummy Time Is Only For The Weak

2008-05-25T21:49:00.002-05:00

Our daily dose of "tummy time" always seems to end like this!

Just Hangin' Around

2008-05-24T21:59:00.008-05:00

Kallie loves to hang out with daddy in the Lascal carrier. They are the best of buds. She definitely stares at him and follows his every move much more than she does me.

Nothing compares to a daddy.

SACRIFICES.

2008-05-23T15:52:00.006-05:00

Four weeks have flown by.

For four weeks I've struggled with learning "the ropes" of parenting a newborn. I finally (with the help of Crazy Pills, thank you very much) feel like I'm getting the hang of it and am a little more confident in my abilities as a mother.

Truth be told, I was not doing well the first couple of weeks. Learning to sacrifice after 32 years of being set in my own OCD ways was quite a blow to my little world.

I could talk about the sickening pain of extreme constipation after a c-section.
I could talk about the absolute torture of breastfeeding.
I could entertain you with thoughts of sleepless nights and diarrhea explosions.
I could write about the major postpartum depression that consumed me (and still does somewhat).
I could tell you of the time I put my socks and shoes on while sitting on the toilet just to maximize time while she was screaming to be picked up.
I could discuss how motherhood has taught me to become ambidextrous while eating cold food and talented at keeping a pacifier in a wailing baby's mouth with my big toe, while simultaneously blow drying my hair.
I could talk about the pain of breastfeeding while putting on makeup just to make the little one happy and to avoid being late at the doctor's office.
I could write about the time I almost left the house without brushing my teeth and got out of the shower without rinsing the conditioner out of my hair.
I could tell you about the lack of freedom and requirement of an army of resources just to venture into the outside world.

Of course, motherhood comes with many sacrifices...most of them I knew about prior to birth and most of them I sacrifice willingly.

However, there is one sacrifice that I was not prepared for. One that I have lived with ever since I can remember and really don't have any desire to give up. One that has caused me great discomfort now that it's power has all but ceased in our house.

The ceiling fan.

I am the world's hottest sleeper on record ever since Peanut busted my water bed at the seams and controlling the temperature of the bed was no longer an option. I sweat like a pig, wish I had a window unit directly blowing on my body, and I just might resort to finding mud to roll around in. Now that Kallie is sleeping in our room, I can no longer have the ceiling fan on mega high because we really would prefer her to not blow away in the middle of the night. For the first week I didn't even turn it on which is nothing short of a miracle. Now, it's on the second slowest speed...which might as well not even exist, if you ask me. It's killing me, people.

But, it's all for a good cause. Soon, the ceiling fan will roar again in our room. Soon, I will not awake in a puddle of sweat (and sweaty milk). I will be reunited with my love and life will return to normalcy.

But, please, somebody write it in the record books for all the world to see...I have gone four weeks without a ceiling fan.

A mother will sacrifice everything, I tell you.

How Do I Possibly Pay It Forward?

2008-05-13T20:01:00.003-05:00

Not only am I blessed with an amazing husband and beautiful baby girl, but my support system is more than I can fathom.

I feel overwhelmed.

For three years people have prayed and supported us. For three years it has been about bringing home a baby. For three years I feel I have not had the energy to support anyone other than myself.

And now she is here. The wait is over and it is my turn to start supporting. Sadly enough, this intimidates me and I feel I can't possibly do justice to the amount of support we have been shown.

How will I ever pay this forward? That is my constant thought right now...one I am working through minute by minute of the day. Soon I will be strong. Soon I will get into a routine and then it will be my turn to shower those around me with love, prayers and mountains of support.

For now, I am so very thankful to everyone. Words will never suffice, but soon...very soon...I will try with every ounce in me to pay it foward.

So Here's What Happened

2008-04-26T23:24:00.010-05:00

I'm not a talented writer like Melissa which is why I made such a basic title. This way there would be no expectations.

On Friday morning at 3 am, Melissa woke up to a huge contraction and was ready to get to the hospital. After sitting for a while she decided we could wait and leave as planned at 6:30 for our 9:30 c-section. Thirty minutes later we decided to go on in. On the way in her contractions were about three minutes apart, but Kallie stayed in due to the cerclage. I was confident she was not going to be born anytime soon, but I still took the opportunity to drive fast (I was secretly hoping to get pulled over). We called the after hours number and the on-call doctor for the practice was going to meet us at the hospital.

We sat around the hospital for a while and to make a long story short, Kallie was born at 7:03am. She was letting us know that we have a little control, but she was ultimately going to decide when she would come.

Everything is going well here, Melissa has slept about 3 hours over the past 48, so she is now resting. Tonight we will be sending Kallie to the nursery, because having her with us last night was not as beautiful and peaceful as we had planned.

Melissa should be back soon with a real post.

Tim

A New Day

2008-04-25T14:00:00.005-05:00

Kallie Zane

6 lbs., 15 oz.
19.75 inches

More to come soon.